You've internalised the dysfunction of the legal profession

Hello {{first_name}},

In a profession which rewards people based on the amount of hours they work, of course overwork is going to be a thing! The issue is that all this becomes normalized beginning in law school. So when you get older and can’t pull all nighters, or have a family or simply need to be getting the 7 to 8 hours a night as every study ever done on sleep shows most people need - you think YOU are the problem. That is the dysfunction and toxic part. In the same way as a (now in recovery) addict, I once hung around with people who took increasing amounts of drugs and drank themselves silly, it normalised this behaviour. If everyone is doing it, it really does seem normal. Taking your phone to the loo to continue to check mails seems normal. Taking a laptop on holiday and just checking in for a few hours in the mornings seems normal. Checking your phone between contractions when you’ve gone into labour, seems normal. A 2020 article applauds a young American woman who finished her bar exam while in active labour for “not letting anything get in the way of her dreams!”. Especially not her humanity or the fact she was bringing a new life into the world which probably needed her attention more. I shall try not to judge. I judge the system not the woman. It is the system that is sick and that makes us start to behave in dysfunctional ways too.

So many women I know who are lawyers have almost ignored their pregnancies until the baby was due because the system says that women lawyers need to prove their competence non-stop and pregnancy related weakness or time off is a sign of not being professional, not wanting it enough and a host of other crap. When they return after having the baby, they need to be raring to go and firing on all cylinders. The damage done to women by this system is massive but perhaps a subject for another day...

This is not just about women. It's about lawyers and our enslavement by a system we haven't stopped to question - because we didn't have any time to!

This is not a rant at BigLaw.

Many lawyers leave their BigLaw jobs and find they are working just as hard and just as long. They still take their phone to the loo! And work on public holidays! And put more on their list each day than they can reasonably fit in and then beat themselves up for not managing it all.

You need to recognise the dysfunction.

You need to call it out.

You need to recognise where you’ve internalised the dysfunction.

Then you can start the healing.

Ideally you’ll create your own list, but you can start by looking at this one. You can break free. It takes a bit of work - but OMG it's worth it. I speak to soul-led lawyers doing such beautiful work in the world and they can barely recognise the lawyers they used to be.

Dysfunctional belief: There is never enough time.

New belief: We all have 24 hours in a day and no one knows how many days we get.

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Dysfunctional belief: You have to fight for your share of the money.

New belief: Money is a renewable resource.

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Dysfunctional belief: You either win or you lose. Your clients win or they lose.

New belief: When all stakeholders are given a voice it is extraordinary what creative solutions to disputes can be found.

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Dysfunctional belief: Always think of everything that could go wrong

New Belief: Always think of everything that could go right.

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Dysfunctional belief: Don't ever let your feelings get in the way of making a judgment.

New Belief: Recognise that your feelings will always dictate your actions unless you learn to recognise and then observe them.

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Dysfunctional belief: Avoid taking risks for yourself or your clients.

New Belief: Creativity is inherently risky and so is innovation. In order to create and innovate you’ll have to risk getting something wrong and being OK with that.

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Dysfunctional belief: Conflict is negative. It is to be avoided.

New Belief: Conflict is transformative. It offers us exactly what we need to look at to change, grow and evolve.

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Dysfunctional belief: You must keep your phone charging next to your bed all night in case a client or your boss needs you, from the time you first enter a law firm until you retire.

New Belief: Law is seldom a life and death matter but there are big egos involved in both lawyers and clients which like to inflate the importance of legal matters. Charging your phone next to your bed is incredibly bad for your health. Google it. Put the phone in the kitchen and only leave it on if you need to hear from your loved ones. ​
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The world has enough burnt out, disillusioned adrenally fatigued lawyers. You don't need to be one of them.

Want to know more about how to be a happier lawyer?

Reach out if you’re interested in discovering how to create the next UPLEVELLED version of YOU.

I run Awakening Lawyers to help lawyers who love the law but are disillusioned and disheartened by the way it’s practised, to re-imagine and redesign their lives so that they can practice in their own way, in their own time, and on their own terms.

I am a legal futurist, a lawyer coach and a channel.
I love working with lawyers at all stages of their awakening journey, especially those who are starting to see a new role for themselves as peacemakers, as justice warriors and as activists for social change. I work with my clients to deal with the challenges they face working within a restrictive and often conservative legal culture that promotes hiding your authentic self under a professional mask and suppressing both your own and your client’s emotions.

l look forward to hearing from you if it feels right. Always go by HOW YOU FEEL. If this feels exciting - reach out to me.
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